BS’D
In the midst of a trial or nisayon, some of us may struggle to see the good in our lives. What does Rebbe Nachman advise in such cases?
First, during hitbodedut we have to work hard to search high and low for Hashem’s kindness to us, to actively focus on the times when His gracious hand is clearly revealed. But Rebbe Nachman also advises that we should utter words of thanks even if our hearts are not moved. Eventually our words lo lishma will melt the high walls and secured fortress surrounding our hearts. Even in the absence of intense emotion, hitbodedut can still successfully peel away the klipot (shells) covering the heart and transforms our hearts into a vessel that captures Hashem’s light.
Singing or humming holy music or niggunim during hitbodedut is an excellent way of opening our hearts. Such music may awaken hidden feelings or forgotten memories and may inspire a connection to Hashem. Alternatively, we can choose a certain passuk or verse from Chazal and repeatedly recite it with intense concentration. The holy words act as a laser beam, piercing our heart with emotion. For instance, repeating “Ribbono Shel Olam or “Avinu Malkenu” a thousand times may enhance our emotional bond with our Creator.
Even sitting in pure silence during hitbodedut has the power to inject great light into our soul. Despite the absence of words, there remains a strong desire to communicate with Hashem. This type of silence is a spiritual silence, originating from intense feelings that cannot be expressed via words. Though not auditory, we are still connecting with Hashem on a deep, spiritual level. This type of silence goes beyond words and is described in Tehillim, “Lecha Dumia Tehillah (Silence is praise to You…) (see (65:2)”.
Regardless of the method we choose, each hitbodedut session serves to knock down another brick from the wall around our hearts, until eventually we can access our true internal neshama and connect fully with Hashem.
