Author Archives: Orit Esther Riter

BS’D

Do you know where life is taking you? Do you like the things that life is showing you? The answer to question one is probably no. The answer to question two is all dependent on whether you are aware of your purpose in life.

The answer to question two is no if you want your life to be as you want it to be. The answer to question two is no if you aren’t in touch with your inner point of greatness and infinite potential. The answer to question two is no if you are confused over why you are here and don’t know what your life is all about. Question one can remain no yet still have no effect on whether you live a happy fulfilled life; as long as you know that there is ‘Someone’ who does know where you are heading.

We each travel on individual spiritual paths tailor planned for us to reach our eternal destination, B’H after 120. Hashem has a very meticulous plan outlining every route, alleyway, and footpath we are meant to stride on. When we decide to focus our mind, heart and eyes on Hashem’s road realizing that there is no better track for us to walk on, we will be able to say yes to question two.

We don’t need to know what is ahead, only that we have the ‘best tour guide’ in the world who is taking us to the places we need to ‘visit.’ Let us stay focused on Who is leading us and continuously talk with Him along the way. This will keep us feeling calm, safe and assured that He is shepherding us to our journey’s end.

BS’D

‘Residing in Meah Shearim, R. Ofer teaches a well known segulah (spiritual practice that increases one’s merit) to remove sadness. He recommends reading chapter 147:3 of Tehillim seven times consecutively without interruption upon feeling melancholy. This pasuk says, “Ha-rofeh li’shvurei lev, u’michabesh l’atzvosam— He Who is the Healer to the brokenhearted will also bind up their wounds.”

In order to fully understand the meaning of this pasuk, we also need to analyze the previous and latter pesukim. The previous pasuk reads, “Nidchei Yisrael yichanes,” which, when taking the first letter of each of these three words, spells the word yayin (wine). Some interpret this as suggesting that when we are downhearted, we should sip wine to lift our spirits. Elsewhere in Tehillim it is written, “Yayin yismach levav enosh— Wine makes glad the heart of the man” The Radak’s commentary on this pasuk is that when wine is drunk—in moderation!—it leads man to be happy.

The latter pasuk (147:4) reads, “Moneh mispar la’kochavim, l’chulam sheimos yikrah— He who fixes the number of the stars calls all of them, too, by name.” This pasuk teaches us that each and every one of us is important in Hashem’s eyes because Hashem knows each of His dispersed sons by name. The Ibn Ezra writes that no one is lost in His count. Just as He is aware of every star and their particular task, He is aware of our pain, our tikkun (soul’s path of rectification) and our hardships, and He is there for us through it all. Remembering this wisdom will prevent us from ever feeling alienated or alone.

The Baal Shem Tov suggests that we turn to tefillah which eventually leads to an elevation of our spirits. Tefillah should be done from a place called lev nishbar (a broken heart) rather than a state of hopelessness or of complaint. It is ideal to pray to the Borei Olam through a voice of hope rather than of anguish— with a broken heart in need of mending and dependant only on the Borei Olam to send him his yeshuah. Consequently, through tefillah our broken heart will be mended and we will be uplifted to a state of joy.’

– “Turn Around” by Orit Esther Riter, Day 136, pg. 310

BS’D

What is Emuna? To paraphrase Sefer Hachinuch, Mitzva 25- It is the belief that the world has only One G-d and it is through His power and desire that everything ever was, is and will come to exist. Emuna is the foundation of Judaism. Emuna is believing in this fundamental truth as outlined in the Torah and that anything else is simply impossible. This teaching relates to Hashem’s greatness and goodness and our lack of strength and understanding to grasp all matters. From where do we attain our Emuna? R’ Hirsch ztk’l teaches that emuna is the trust that develops from our experience with Hashem’s power and reliability. It is expressed through our willingness to allow our lives to be directed and developed in accordance to His will.

The RamBam ztk’l outlines the thirteen principles of emuna as follows:

1) We must believe that any part of existence is impossible without the existence of our Creator. Yet, the Creator requires nothing for His existence.
2) There is only One G-d. Nothing in the universe can be compared to His Oneness.
3) G-d has no body or physical aspect
4) G-d has always been in existence and always will be. He is eternal.
5) There is no power besides G-d whom it is fitting to serve.
6) G-d bestows prophecy to those who follow all of the Torah commandments and merit to perfect their personal attributes.
7) The prophecy of Moshe was greater than any other prophecy before or since.
8) Belief that the entire Torah is true and completely accurate as dictated to Moshe by G-d.
9) Since the entire Torah comes from G-d, one may not add to it or take away from it.
10) G-d is aware of all of our actions.
11) There is reward and punishment for our actions.
12) Mashiach ben Dovid can come at any time and he will be a greater king than any other human king.
13) At the proper time, there will be a revival of the dead for those righteous individuals who deserve it.

BS’D

Those who have internalized bitachon to the extent that they apply it to everyday life situations experience far less anxiety than otherwise. Bitachon is the strongest indicator that he has cast his burdens onto HaKadosh Baruch Hu. If we can simply say “I accept the circumstances of my life for what they are,” we remind ourselves that whatever Hashem desires is just good and we accept it with love.

Ultimately, bitachon is the only true answer to all of life’s queries. No falsehoods, just unassuming emes (truth). Our Creator wants us to serve Him in purity and simplicity. Accepting the conditions of life with humility implants the knowledge that we do not know what is best for us, only the Ribbono Shel Olam does. Humility works hand in hand with contentment.

The Vilna Gaon teaches us that innermost serenity is achieved when we are satisfied with the physical possessions that we have, without any desire for more. The opposite of contentment is desire, a major transgression. Bitachon should not stop us from following natural paths to achieve what we need in order to survive. That is our hishtadlus. However, yearning for more than this minimum requirement is acting with desire— a trait to be wary of.

For instance, let’s consider a person searching for his bashert (soulmate). Many people invest extensive time and energy into finding their marriage partner. This search is often fraught with tension and glitches. Things may not seem to work out the way one predicts. When one finally thinks they have found the right one… it falls through.

Yet, brewing under the surface, from a place where you least expect it, a new prospect is proposed. Baruch Hashem he or she is The One! Only in hindsight  can many people appreciate Hashem’s handiwork in arranging that the previous possibility fell through. Though it was all for the best at the time it fell through, without bitachon we may only see the brilliance of Hashem’s plan with hindsight.

– “Turn Around” by Orit Esther Riter, Day 126, pg.290

Dovid HaMelech cries, “Penei eilai v’choneni, ki yecheed v’ani ani— Turn to me and show me favor, for I am alone and afflicted [lit., poor].”

Often, when we do a self-accounting of our deeds we reach a candid place where we come to realize how alone and helpless we truly are. Our zechuyos (meritorious deeds) are in short supply, and our future rests only on rachamei Shamayim (Hashem’s compassion). Consequently, we may feel “alone and afflicted.” It dawns on us that there is no one to rely on other than on our father in Shamayim (Ein al mi l’hisha’en ela al Avinu she’baShamayim).

However, once we have entered deep into the mindset of how much we depend on HaKadosh Baruch Hu, and daven from the depth of our soul to Him, we can be assured that He will show His kindness and help us. As it says, “Ba’ erev yalin bechi, v’la-boker rinah— In the evening one lies down weeping, but with dawn, a cry od joy.” In the evening, when we face hardships, we go to sleep weeping and experience a negative mindset. “But with dawn” — when good fortune appears on the horizon — we cry tears of joy and we see everything in a positive light.

Life may feel like a rollercoaster; sometimes good times and sometimes bitter times. When we experience smooth sailing, it is relatively easy to think positively — everything is good and will be good. Yet, the opposite is true as well. The trick is to avoid this rollercoaster by constantly reminding ourselves— particularly during the tough times— that everything is for the good. When we think rosy, things become rosy.

No matter how tough or negative a situation appears, we should revitalize ourselves to stay positive in our thinking. We can actively search for every minute benefit that may accrue from that situation, no matter how small or far-fetched. The impact of our mindset is more powerful than we can fathom. As someone once said, “Life is all about perception. It is not what it is— it is what we think it is.”

– “Turn Around” by Orit Esther Riter, Day 68, pg.172

BS’D

Every emotion (even if born out of mundane occurrences) and every spout of inspiration contains within it a message from our soul. Whatever the cause may be that is upsetting and causing us frustration we must turn to Hashem since this is the way that He speaks to us, through our feelings. There is no one and no where else to turn but to ask Hashem for help. What kind of help? We ask for clarity of mind and understanding and for the ability to accept and internalize that everything is for the best.

One of the most difficult tasks in this world is to live life mindfully; to be aware of what is happening inside and outside of ourselves. Acknowledging and accepting our feelings while letting go of those that harm us carves the path for healthier relationships with ourselves, those around us and of course Hashem. If we are boggled down with emotional turmoil and dismiss our feelings, we miss out on the prime opportunity to understand our soul’s needs and complete her rectification.

Our soul is hiding under layers of ‘covers’ and is a spring that waits to burst forth. However we must dig and search for cracks in our soul and always strive to expose her light. With each time that we tend to our various emotions, we expose our soul more and more thus making it easier for her to wake up with passion and inspiration more easily. We can sensitize our mind to the point where we will see Hashem in everything…. just listen to your heart!

BS’D

Why do bad things happen to good people? The Midrash Bereishis Rabbah (32:3) gives three metaphors in trying to tackle this ancient question that probes the minds of both young and old:

* Rabbi Yonatan explains: a potter checking his pots (by tapping their surface) does not hit the weak pots that would crack. Yet, he checks the strong pots that can withstand numerous hits without shattering. So too does Hashem test the strongest of His children.

*Rabbi Yossi ben Chanina teaches: when a flax dealer knows that his flax is of superior quality he does not hesitate to beat it as this causes it to thicken. However a thinner piece of flax will crack when whipped.

* Rabbi Elazar explains: When a farmer has two cows one strong and one weak, which one will he use to carry the heavy load?

The first teaching seems to suggest that checking the pots is for the purpose of the pot and not for the potter in order to demonstrate to the pot how strong it truly is. The second lesson learned from Rabbi Yossi is that hitting the flax strengthens the flax itself and increases its quality and ability to withstand hardship. Rabbi Elazar in the third explanation brings down that difficulties helps strengthen others by example. So, next time you feel like you are carrying the heavy load, know you have been sent the exact amount of weight Hashem knows you can handle.

BS’D

Rav Avigdor Miller ztk’l was known for his emphasis on appreciating the wonder and beauty of nature and the vast wisdom of the world that Hashem created among a multitude of other qualities from which we can learn so much. This classic story epitomizes his constant focus on appreciation for Hashem.

Once, a grandchild visited Rav Miller at home and was puzzled to see his grandfather with his face in the sink. After a few minutes, Rav Miller stood up, and breathed deeply. “The air is so wonderful,” he said.

His grandchild said, “Why was your face in the water for so long that you couldn’t even breathe properly?” Rav Miller said, “On my way home, someone started talking to me and commented that lately, the air has been polluted. I didn’t want my appreciation of Hashem’s air to lessen, so I decided to deepen my appreciation of air. After depriving myself of air for just a short while, I now am even more thankful to Hashem for providing us with such wonderful air. (Rabbi Shmuel Brog)

BS’D

Our ‘natural’ inclination is to be drawn towards materialism. Physical pleasures and possessions uplift the ‘earthly nature’ of man. R’ Yisrael Salanter ztk’l describes it beautifully when he writes:

‘Insofar as man is a physical being – ‘dust from the ground’ – his heart inclines to the material. Therefore, he desires to ‘eat, drink, and be merry.’ He loves wealth and fortune, and longs for honor and dominion. He is full of self-importance and seeks to delight in bodily comforts.’

However the base challenge remains the same regardless of how much we acquire; there is no end to ones desires. Essentially our craving is insatiable. Our wise Sages have been known to say, “No one leaves this world with even half his desires fulfilled.” A practical solution – Live a more simple life!

Let’s enclose ourselves in our personal Teiva (ark) and ask ourselves, “What do I really need in this life?” The mighty stormy flood of Noach carries us away from our true mission in life. The Alter Rebbe ztk’l, Ba’al HaTanya HaKadosh elucidates that the turbulent waters of Noach are worries concerning our parnassa (livelihood). Of course we need food, shelter, clothes and the like. But what can we live without?

Differentiate between a need to a desire. A need is vital. A desire is driven by emotions that results in a demand – I must have it! That is the warning sign that the flood waters has risen to dangerously high levels. When this occurs, we must go back into our safe haven, our ark, a life of Torah and Tefillah, and re-align ourselves back to our needs.

BS’D

The Ba’al Shem Tov HaKadosh teaches that nothing is more harmful to the soul then living a life empty of joy. A baby is born with an innate tendency towards happiness. In time their perception of life changes and they view the world negatively since life has a way of ‘disappointing’ people over time.

What is the source of this disappointment? It may arise from setting goals, materialistic or spiritual, that aren’t attainable which leads to a general feeling of failure. Yet we must emphasize once again the importance of perception when it comes to reaching a state of happiness. The founding principle of happiness originates from the understanding that one’s worth is not based on personal pleasure; only from the delight infused from living a life of G-dly purpose.

When our hearts feed us the message, “I need more, I want more,” genuine lasting joy becomes unreachable. Selfish desires are never satisfied; the body always wants more. However, knowing that all is from Hashem and is intended to fulfill the purpose we were created for, makes us happy. In this way, a person feels she has absolutely everything she needs at every given moment; if she needed more, she would have more.

Joy is firmly linked to how we see things; that is in our hands. Often we cannot change the circumstances in our lives, but we can always change how we accept and live with it. When we go through life with a clear vision of fulfilling our purpose, we won’t be disappointed with what life serves us. Setbacks are indicators of detours in the road. Hashem with His Infinite wisdom kindly places them to align us back to where we need to go. Just say, “Hashem take me where I need to go” and you’ll never be disappointed.